How Lisa seduced me and changed my life…

At a recent careers fair held at Dr Challoner’s High School in Bucks which I attended, representing the world of “media”, one of the most frequently asked questions by the students was “How did you get involved in media?”. Well, it was a long winding road but I can trace the roots way back to the oddest interview I ever had…

….“I want you to use this computer to work out 2 x 3 and I want you to tell me your thought processes as you do it” the man said. This was a job interview. This was 1984. The job was Field Service Engineer. The man was Ted Davison, Managing Director, BTS. I’d never used a computer.

I lived and breathed bicycles – I raced them, I toured on them, I built them, fixed them and sold them. I knew pretty much everything there was to know about chains, sprockets, gears, wheels and frames. I could even tell you which saddle would suit you best. And no, madam, the lycra shorts don’t make your bum look big. My claim to fame – being the only member in the then 105 year history of the Anerley Bicycle Club to beat the hour for 25 miles on a single geared fixed wheel bike. Time:59m 54s on the Colchester bypass course, 86inch gear. That was my life.

It was the Christmas party. Actually it wasn’t. It was before the Christmas party because Julian was already wanting to move on so I don’t really know when it started. But it started for me, that is when my direct involvement started, at the Christmas party.

Normal kind of thing, finger food, plastic glasses, white wine, red wine, slightly stilted atmosphere, lots of in-jokes and shop talk that made absolutely no sense. Here’s an example or two “..and you’ll never believe it, the twat was half way up the M6 when he remembered he’d forgotten the memory chips!” and “We got the floppy disk back with a with compliments slip stapled to it”. Nostalgia is swelling up in me as I type this.

Two weeks later I was sat in front of a computer and Julian was still wanting to move on and I had to use this machine to work out 2 x 3. I’d met this short guy with a goatee at the party. Turned out to be the MD. History doesn’t record, or my memory doesn’t recall, what was said by whom about what. But whatever it was, and whoever said it, it was enough for the short guy, Ted, to invite me back for an interview.

Ted knew I had never used a computer. I knew that too and I also knew that Ted knew and you can’t bullsh*t your way through that kind of situation. As I’m Marketing Director you might think I’d be able to do that all the time, but I wasn’t Marketing Director then.

Come to think of it I didn’t even know that marketing existed, let alone what it was. In any case, my marketing is bullshit-free. But I did know a keyboard when I saw one. “That’s a keyboard” I said, pointing at the keyboard. “And that’s the computer” I said, pointing at the computer. “And that’s a box of disks” I said pointing to a box with “3M Disks” written on it.

“But I don’t know what that is” I said, pointing to an object I didn’t recognise from any of the sci-fi films I had seen.

“That’s a mouse” said Ted.

There are times when the human brain just freezes. Probably stemming from its primitive reptilian roots, it can’t just assimilate new information in random order. Information input needs to flow smoothly. Mine was grooving down hi-tech – circuit boards and chips and Dolby and computer crashes – whatever they were.

A small, furry, cheese-eating animal with four legs and a tail did not fit into the world my brain was struggling to create. The non-sequiter was too much, the conceptual leap too great, so the brain shut down, eyebrows furrowed, vacant expression assumed and the last remaining few functioning cells kicked the vocal chords into life which emitted something that sounded like “You what?”.

“A mouse” repeated Ted.

In answer to the obvious question “what does it do?” Ted asked me to find out. So I prodded it. And the screen lit up. A light bulb went on. “Ah” I said. “How do you think it works?”. I turned it over and saw. And remembered. I had stayed on at school and did A level Biology and Physics. I failed the mock in one and got a F in the other, but I did remember variable resisters and X, Y coordinates. And that’s what I said.

And I was right.

Two weeks later I was out on the road fixing DEC PDP11 computers. In the interview I had used the mouse successfully, found the calculator, got 6 and got the job. Julian had moved on and now I was fully kitted out with an Astra 1.3 estate, tool kit, spares and an oscilloscope. I was wrestling with a command line operating system called RSTS and swapping memory chips and upgrading processors.

But always on my mind was that amazing machine, the first computer I had ever used.

It could draw, it could paint, it could write, it could do maths and plot graphs. And I could use it, I was in control, I could do anything, I had no fear. I was seduced. It was Lisa, named I believe after Steve Jobs’ daughter.

And I’ve been in love with the Mac ever since…

How did you get involved in podcasts?

_____

[Note: of course podcasts can be produced on both Mac and PC]

Kangaroo bounced out of court

The BBC, ITV and Channel 4 all have an on-line presence, notably the iPlayer. For some time now they’ve been collaborating on a Video on Demand project called Kangaroo whereby their content is made available from one jointly run location.

Yesterday the Competition Commission stopped the project in its tracks as in their view Kangaroo would present too much of a threat to competition for independent VOD suppliers. There had been an interim report published in December, which expressed concerns about this, but in the opinion of the Competition Commission had not been sufficiently addressed.

“After detailed and careful consideration, we have decided that this joint venture would be too much of a threat to competition in this developing market and has to be stopped,” said Peter Freeman, Chairman of the Commission.

“The case is essentially about the control of UK-originated TV content. VOD is an exciting and fast-moving development in TV, which makes programmes previously broadcast available to viewers at a time of their choice. The evidence we saw showed that UK viewers particularly value programmes produced and originally shown in the UK and do not regard other content as a good substitute.

“BBC Worldwide, ITV and Channel 4 together control the vast majority of this material, which puts them in a very strong position as wholesalers of TV content to restrict competition from other current and future providers of VOD services to UK viewers. We thought the joint venture parties would have an interest in doing so, in order to make Project Kangaroo a success.”

Freeman added that without Kangaroo, and therefore by having to run their own individual VOD services, the three broadcasters will have to compete for viewers’ attention and that viewers will be better served as a result.

“We thought that viewers would benefit from better VOD services if the parties—possibly in conjunction with other new and/or already established providers of VOD—competed with each other.”

In a joint statement, the three broadcasters said:

“We are disappointed by the decision to prohibit this joint venture. While this is an unwelcome finding for the shareholders, the real losers from this decision are British consumers. This is a disproportionate remedy and a missed opportunity in the further development of British broadcasting.”

The issues raised are complex. The BBC is funded by the license fee, ITV and Channel 4 are commercial companies. Are the latter riding on the relatively safe income of the former? Do license fee payers want their annual fees to subsidise these commercial companies? Would this pooling of resources also provide more original UK programming, rather than just distribution of content? Would independent producers also be able to also contribute and distribute content? 

We’re less certain that we agree with the ruling though. All three protagonists are already online, so what difference would it make if their content was centralised? It would for sure be a bit more convenient for the consumers, if the model was a la iPlayer, free to download or stream.

Wouldn’t it be great if either the iPlayer or something like Kangaroo was open to independent producers of content, such as podcasters, this becoming the UK’s equivalent of iTunes? In a separate document I recently read, this has indeed been mooted, but only as a marginal bullet point. In my view this idea should take centre stage – what do you think?

Somehow I don’t think we’ve heard the last of Kangaroo… and one thing is for sure… more and more content is becoming available on line and the disintermediation of the internet means that with canny marketing and quality content, independent producers such as members of UKPA have a fighting chance.